In my last post, I explained how the words that parents use with their children can influence how secure they become. Words are powerful to be sure, but, as the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. To foster a health sense of security in your children, your actions, and those your children, can really [...]
Words have a powerful effect on your children. What you say impacts what they think about themselves and their world, the actions they take as they explore their world, and the emotions they experience as they interact with their world. Your words can create a child who is secure and comfortable with themselves. Or, your [...]
Some time ago, I wrote a post about a TED talk in which the speaker recommended that parents allow their children to engage in risky behavior, for example, play with fire, own a pocket knife, throw spears, take apart appliances, and drive a car. I agreed with his views though I also suggested that, because he wasn’t a parent, it was easy for him to say. In contrast, as parents, we all struggle with a fundamental question: How much risk for our children? This question is one I ask myself often because I believe that parents these days are far too protective of their children. Many parents ‘bubble wrap’ their kids with the best of intentions to safeguard them from life’s dangers. I would argue , however, that these parents are actually doing their children a disservice by not allowing them to gain experiences that will build confidence and instill resilience that will be essential for success and happiness later in life. This question arose in my mind over the weekend as my wife and I had some fun adventures with our two daughters (ages 8 and 6). Our girls rode their bikes, swam, and climbed high on play structures. At a more mundane level, we also hung around the house during which time they climbed up on the kitchen counters, cut vegetables with a sharp knife, and helped my wife cook dinner on the stove. Additionally, our daughters rode their scooters on the sidewalk in front of our house and went for a walk around the neighborhood by themselves. Next weekend, we’re going up to the mountains to ski.
I was interviewed by KIRO radio in Seattle the other day about the Seahawk's quarterback, Russell Wilson, and how he was able to maintain his confidence and composure after fumbling on the first play of the NFC Championship game against San Francisco. In the interview, we also explore whether professional athletes are different from regular [...]
Here's a link to a great video in which three of Canada's top female ski racers demonstrate and discuss how they use positive self-talk and mental imagery to prepare them for success.
It’s one thing to say you want to raise competent children. It’s an entirely different thing to know how to raise competent children. This post explores three practical ways in which you can help your children to become competent—and confident—people. Catchphrases for Competence My 8-year-old, Catie, came up with our family’s catchphrase for competence when [...]
Setting expectations for your ski racing children is an essential responsibility to help your children ski their fastest and achieve their goals. Expectations communicate messages to your children about what’s important to you and establish a standard toward which your children can strive. But expectations can be double-edged swords. They can be a tremendous benefit [...]
Hopefully, you’ve spent the summer getting ready for this winter of racing. If so, you should be stronger, better technically, and more mentally prepared than ever before. You're now entering the final stage of preparations for the upcoming race season with a final period of conditioning followed by getting back on snow and tuning up [...]
I have been thinking a great deal about what it takes for athletes to achieve what I consider to be an essential goal in all of your efforts, namely, when your game, match, round, race, or other type of competition concludes, you are make two statements: “I was as prepared as I could be to [...]
Of course you love your children and would never consciously reward your children with love and attention when they, for example, first sit up or walk, score their first goal, or get an A on a school test, or punish their failures with anger or rejection. The challenge is to become aware of the unconscious, [...]