My Kids Don’t Fear Me (But is That a Good Thing?)
I have two daughters, ages 8 and 6. Overall, they’re pretty good kids, generally kind and mostly cooperative. But like most children their ages, they are often stubborn, frequently resistant, and occasionally disrespectful of my wife and me. I may ask them to put their shoes on so they can leave for school in the […]
Read MoreLife is Fragile: Say “I Love You” a Lot
I remember my life in my 20s and 30s when I was single. I felt invincible. Life was so carefree. I lived in the present, didn’t think much about the future, and didn’t worry too much about anything (except perhaps finding a wife). No longer. I’m well into middle age now (yikes!), married, and with […]
Read MoreIncredible Story about World’s Greatest Free Solo Rock Climber
I just heard an interview with Alex Honnold, the world’s greatest free solo (i.e., no ropes) rock climber. What he does is beyond unreal. There is ZERO margin of error. One of the very few examples of an activity that truly requires perfection (or you die!). Here are several videos of his climbing. You can […]
Read MoreActions Speak Louder Than Words in Raising Secure Children
In my last post, I explained how the words that parents use with their children can influence how secure they become. Words are powerful to be sure, but, as the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. To foster a health sense of security in your children, your actions, and those your children, can really […]
Read MoreWhat Parents Can Say to Raise Secure Children
Words have a powerful effect on your children. What you say impacts what they think about themselves and their world, the actions they take as they explore their world, and the emotions they experience as they interact with their world. Your words can create a child who is secure and comfortable with themselves. Or, your […]
Read MoreRisk-Taking for Your Children: How Much is Enough?
Some time ago, I wrote a post about a TED talk in which the speaker recommended that parents allow their children to engage in risky behavior, for example, play with fire, own a pocket knife, throw spears, take apart appliances, and drive a car. I agreed with his views though I also suggested that, because he wasn’t a parent, it was easy for him to say. In contrast, as parents, we all struggle with a fundamental question: How much risk for our children?
This question is one I ask myself often because I believe that parents these days are far too protective of their children. Many parents ‘bubble wrap’ their kids with the best of intentions to safeguard them from life’s dangers. I would argue , however, that these parents are actually doing their children a disservice by not allowing them to gain experiences that will build confidence and instill resilience that will be essential for success and happiness later in life.
This question arose in my mind over the weekend as my wife and I had some fun adventures with our two daughters (ages 8 and 6). Our girls rode their bikes, swam, and climbed high on play structures. At a more mundane level, we also hung around the house during which time they climbed up on the kitchen counters, cut vegetables with a sharp knife, and helped my wife cook dinner on the stove. Additionally, our daughters rode their scooters on the sidewalk in front of our house and went for a walk around the neighborhood by themselves. Next weekend, we’re going up to the mountains to ski.
Read MoreChildren Gain Competence by Doing
Competence is an essential quality that children need to develop to become fully functioning adults. In fact, one thing that separates adults from children is the former’s broad repertoire of capabilities that enable them to navigate the world including physical, intellectual, emotional, social, and practical skills. But competencies are necessary, but not sufficient to become […]
Read MoreLatest News: Fox Business News Interview: Psychology of the Stock Market
I was recently interviewed on Fox Business News on the topic of the Psychology of the Stock Market. In this interview I discuss the three reasons why many people are afraid to invest in the stock market.
Read More“F&%# It!”: Get the Attitude that Will Set You Free
In my last post, I introduced you to my notion of “mindblocks,” a portmanteau that plays off of the psychological nature of these issues and the term roadblocks. In this post, I will describe to you the attitude that can help you free yourself from your mindblocks and liberate you to create the life that […]
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