It’s one thing to say that you want to be the best athlete you can be. It’s an entirely different thing to actually do the things necessary to achieve that goal. In other words, talk is cheap! You have to want it and you have to want it bad! Why? Because the chances are that you have a lot of forces in your life that don’t always align with your athletic goals and can, in fact, actively pull you away from them. Even worse, they can actually hurt your efforts to accomplish your goals. These conflicting forces might include wanting to stay out late with your friends, eating a bunch of junk food, spending time staring at a screen, skipping workouts, the list goes on. When faced with these options, you have to make a choice about what’s most important to you.

Forks in the Road

I call these choices “forks in the road,” in which you have the option of two or more directions you can take. In fact, you are faced with potentially meaningful forks in the road every day in your sport and your life:

• “Should I do my warm-up before practice?”
• “Should I go to bed early tonight?”
• “Should I eat that cinnamon bun before my competition?”
• “Should I put my phone away, so I can focus on my competitive preparations?”
• “Should I do my homework now?”

There are many influences that can determine which fork in the road you take; for example, fatigue, pain, boredom, equally or more attractive alternatives, and a multitude of distractions that now inhabit the lives of athletes.

There are also bigger forks in the road at various times in your athletic life:

• “Do I want to continue to participate in my sport?”
• “Should I join a different team?”
• “Do I want to compete in college?”

These “existential” questions are impacted by some of the immediate forces I described above, but also by bigger concerns including your current place in your sport (e.g., ranking, starter), your developmental trajectory, what schools you want to attend, and, of course, whether you or your family can afford to take a particular fork in the road.

There are no right-or-wrong answers to any of these questions. The so-called correct answer depends on your values, interests, and goals. At those many forks in the road that you face every day, you must decide what is important to you. You must look at each fork and decide which one you will take. The motivation you bring to your sport, your commitment and determination to achieve your athletic goals, the priority that you place on those goals, and the competing forces acting as a siren’s call for your attention, time, and energy will dictate which road you take and whether you ultimately accomplish your goals.

Efforts = Goals?

An important question for you to ask yourself as you are faced with these forks in the road is whether your efforts are consistent with your goals. In other words, are you putting forth enough effort to achieve your athletic goals? I see a lot of young athletes with big goals, but when I ask them whether their efforts equal their goals, few are willing to raise their hands. But one thing is for sure; if your efforts aren’t in line with your goals, you will not accomplish them. You have two choices, either increase your efforts to match your goals or reduce your goals to match your effort. Again, there is no clear fork to take here, just the fork that you choose.

The Question to Ask

If you have made a true commitment to becoming the best athlete you can be and are willing to “put your money where your mouth is,” then when faced with difficult forks in the road, you can ask yourself one simple question: “Will it help me achieve my sports goals?” This question takes all of the complexities of the many competing forces and boils them down to one simple notion that lies at the heart of being the best athlete you can be. This question also provides a clear distinction when you are tempted by other forces in your lives, most notably, screen time, sleep, and nutrition.

Once you’ve made a real commitment to your sport, this “Will it help me achieve my sports goals?” question filters all of the forks in the road you face and makes your choice of the fork to take abundantly clear.

Especially for young athletes who are still figuring out their priorities and their commitments, one of the most common responses I hear when they are faced with a fork in the road is: “I don’t feel like it today.” This reaction often comes when they are confronted with a fork in the road between short-term fun and long-term commitment to their sport. I hear this when athletes are required to choose whether to do extra drills in their sport, get in additional days of practice during the off season, when they are tired and aren’t in the mood to work out, and when they would like to run around the hotel with their friends the night before a competition. Each of these situations is a test of athletes’ commitment to their sport.

“Commitment means staying loyal to what you said you were going to do long after the mood you said it in has left you.” Jonathan Field, 5-time martial arts world champion

It’s Not Just Athletes’ Commitment

As the saying goes, “It takes a village,” and that applies to sports as well. When athletes make a commitment to their sport, they’re not the only ones making a commitment. Most notably, their parents are also making a significant commitment of time, energy, money, and sometimes making big sacrifices in their own lives (e.g., moving for better coaching, separating from spouses and other children). This commitment from parents makes the ongoing commitment of young athletes especially important. For sure, parents don’t always feel like writing big checks or waking up at 5:30 to drive their kids to early-morning practice, but they do it anyway because they want to support their children’s passion for something that is as positive and healthy as sports. In turn, young athletes need to reciprocate in a similarly committed fashion by making choices that also best support their athletic goals. Without an alignment of commitment between athletes and their parents, there are going to be some very frustrated parents and some very unhappy athletes. At these forks in the road, athletes should always go back to the basic question I suggested that they ask first: “Will it help me achieve my sports goals?” Then, when they take the good road, everyone wins.

Want to take a big step in your mental training? Take a look at my online mental training courses or my latest mental training book, Train Your Mind for Athletic Success.