In my last article, I explored the powerful influence of your emotional baggage on your life; it’s harmful effects on your happiness, relationships, and the pursuit of your life goals. Your response might be: “Okay, I now understand where my emotional baggage came from and how it affects me. But how do I unpack my [...]
My use of the phrase “human doing” may provoke in you some questions: What’s a human doing? What do human doing look and act like? Am I a human doing? This article will answer all of those questions. Plus, if you decide you are a human doing and you decide that you don’t want to [...]
The ability to respond to our lives as a challenge separates us from our primitive forbearers because our evolved brain gives us the opportunity to resist our most basic instincts (though not easily). The fundamental goal behind the challenge response is to pause rather than act instinctively, deactivate the amygdala, engage our cerebral cortex, and [...]
In my last post, I described how we often view situations in our lives as life or death despite the fact that our physical lives aren’t in any danger. The evolutionary-based instinctive response to this perception is the triggering of the survival instinct followed by the fight-or-flight reaction (freeze should also be in there, but [...]
Imagine you’re about to present to your bosses and colleagues at work, take an exam in school, play in the finals of a tennis tournament, or ask someone to marry you. A man comes up to you, shows you a gun, and tells you that if you don’t succeed, he will shoot you dead. How [...]
We humans like to think of ourselves as highly evolved and rational beings who think, feel, and act in ways that are intentional and reasonable. We hold this perception because it enables us to believe that we are “captains” of our lives and help us believe that we are in control of the choices we [...]
In my first article in this two-part series on the forces that shape our lives, I explored the five forces (genes, upbringing, popular culture, technology, and unexpected events) that I believe are most impactful on who we become, the choices we make, and the direction our lives take. In this article, I will introduce what [...]
Choices, options, alternatives, preferences, opportunities, decisions; these are all words that have a powerful impact on our collective psyches as human beings. They evoke free will and self-determination, the ability to become whomever we want to become, and the ability to opt for whatever road we choose in our life’s journey. Yet, whether we actually [...]
In my last article, I introduced you to my concept of a "chamber of pain." In this Part II, I will show you how to empty your emotional chamber of pain. The only way to stop the toxic contents of your chamber of pain from contaminating your life forever is to empty it. At the [...]
My experience, both professionally and personally, is that few people emerge from childhood unscathed from their upbringings. You get your psychological and emotional baggage from your parents (e.g., neglect, abuse), peers (e.g., rejection, bullying), traumatic experiences (e.g., loss of a parent or sibling), or popular culture (e.g., unhealthy values, expectations), to name a few. Sadly, [...]
